Inspiration didn’t come.
I hoped I’d learn something valuable, and to be able to deliver them to you, but I could write about nothing in the past week.
You think I’m enlightened, I’m not.
More than anything, I’m confused.
Here I am teaching you about consciousness, awakening and happiness – but in actual life, I realized pain is everywhere surrounding me. The only difference is while others would struggle through it, I’m just taking them in as is. Big difference? Nope. Happier? Certainly.
I just couldn’t understand how this world works.
And it doesn’t seem to hint an answer at how we could truly live in happiness.
What I’ve wrote about is as close to the answer as most humans are possibly able to realize.
So to further open another door to the answer seems really difficult at this stage for me.
My spiritual teacher Arjuna Ardagh and many others like Ram Dass, Adyashanti etc. are talking about a shift in the consciousness of mankind. They talked about how most people are awakening to this sense of consciousness, to know that humans aren’t supposed to live in the jail of our delusions anymore. But everyday everywhere I go, I sense no difference…
Are humans really awakening? No, allow me to correct my question. Is awakening really needed for the whole world?
Although things are going pretty smoothly for me, these questions kill my brains every single day.
Waking up – trying to release and accept things as is, I still couldn’t help but feel a sense of tremendous frustration for having to blend myself into the ‘hallucination of life.’
But I can’t do anything about it! Because I don’t know if I’m right. I don’t know if others are right either.
The only thing I know is I don’t know and reality isn’t giving us a clue clear enough to know which is the path we should thread on.
What are we supposed to do, the great One?
Why do you help us awaken, but leave us with no clue about the role we should implement?
If so, why would you keep sufferings in the way of our lives – what are you trying to convey?
Living in the now is great, but let us know what we should do in the now at least.
That’s all I would ask to know.